Slade’s Grades Week 1

Welcome back to class everyone, it’s been a long offseason.  I trust that you all enjoyed your summer vacation and I expect a completed journal entry on foolscap about it on my desk by the end of the day.  Don’t leave out any of the juicy stuff on my account either.  Slade’s Grades is happy to announce our new home for the 2017 NFL season here at www.BobTanney.com!  For our newcomers, this article rewards the great play and intelligence displayed by players, coaches and owners during the previous week and chastises the stupid, boneheaded moves.  We reward the good with a passing grade and shame the bad with a fail.  Now without any further wait, let’s get to it… Football is back baby!

*Grading scale:
Pass = A plus – C minus
Fail = D plus – F minus
(C’s gets degrees but D’s don’t)

Week 1 Passes:

Smith spots an open receiver in the NFL's season opener against the defending champion New England Patriots.  

Alex Smith Holds on to his Chiefdom: A+

Alex Smith came into this NFL season on one of the hottest seats in the league.  His bosses traded up in the draft to nab his imminent replacement in Texas Tech’s Patrick Mahomes.  On a team that went to the divisional round by the way.  Then all offseason all you heard out of the Chiefs’ camp was how impressive the rookie QB looked and how his ability to throw the long ball can really open up Andy Reid’s offense.   Then during the moment of truth, under the brightest lights of all of week 1, against the mighty Patriots, Alex Smith went out and put on a clinic.  He schooled Bill Belichick’s supposedly improved defense to the tune of 28 completions on 35 attempts for 368 yards and 4 TDs with zero interceptions in a rout in Foxborough on opening night.  Smith not only helped to turn rookie RB Kareem Hunt and tenderfoot WR Tyreek Hill into Fantasy Football studs, but he also quashed his critics and restless Kansas City natives who couldn’t wait to run the 13-year vet out of town in favor of his ‘gun slinging’ understudy.  Now we all know that NFL fans, coaches and front offices are as fickle as it comes and the Mahomes’ truthers chorus will become louder with every Smith miscue that transpires, but for now, after his week-one performance, Smith has won the confidence of the KC faithful and more importantly, of his teammates and coaches. 

Jacksonville’s D Finds its Bite:  A

Believe me when I tell you that I am the last person to overreact to anything that happens in the NFL in early September.  I fully get that only one week is in the books and Jacksonville had the luxury of playing against a Houston offense that is complete trash and has been for a few years now. But after that impressive performance it’s hard to ignore the possibility that this could FINALLY be the year that all those first round draft picks and high paid free agents on the defensive side of the ball put it all together and play up to their talent level.  A. J. Bouye and Jalen Ramsey have the potential to be the top CB duo in the NFL and played like it on Sunday.  Calais Campbell had 4 sacks… FOUR SACKS!! Talk about earning that offseason free agency money!  The rest of the unit fed off Campbell’s relentlessness and added 6 more sacks for a total of 10 sacks against the hapless Texans’ O-line.  Those are video game type stats.  One game certainly can’t erase the memories of the past decade of ineptitude in Jacksonville, and there is plenty of time for this bandwagon to turn back into the sub-500 pumpkin that we all fully expected it to be coming into this season.  But if Doug Marrone can stick to the formula of playing hard nose defense and pounding the rock with rookie stud Leonard Fournette while keeping Blake Bortles’ hands off the ball as much as possible then this Jags squad may just have a chance.  Let’s face it, they play in the AFC South where 9 wins clinches you a division title on the reg.  If the Defense can hold up its end of the bargain, then that is not out of the realm of possibility.

Matthew Stafford Keeps Coming Back: B+

It turns out that a heavy wallet doesn’t affect Matthew Stafford’s ability to lead a mildly talented team to a 4^th quarter comeback.  Last year he led 8 fourth quarter comebacks (an NFL single season record).  Sunday, he led another one against a formidable Arizona Cardinals defense to bring his career total to 26, which places him 5^th among active QB’s.  The only guys above him on that list are named Brady, Manning, Roethlisberger and Brees.  That’s 10 Super Bowl rings among those 4 names for those keeping track at home.  He started the game on Sunday by tossing a pick six but then rallied to throw 4 TDs and 292 yards.  A lot was made about his offseason contract singing that made him the highest paid QB in the game but Stafford has proven over his 9-year career that he not only has the physical tools but the intestinal fortitude to be an elite franchise quarterback in the NFL.  If Stafford can lead these Lions on another playoff run in a stacked NFC North then it will take an MVP like effort for the $135 million dollar man.  The spotlight is on and it will be interesting to watch and see if Stafford can elevate his status beyond comebacks and paychecks to truly belong among the game’s elite signal callers. 

Week 1 Fails:

Kevin White making his season debut for the Bears in week 1.

Mr. Glass: F-

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before.  Kevin White is injured, again.  The former West Virginia standout and 7^th overall draft pick of the Chicago Bears has been placed on IR yet again.  This time the injury is a broken shoulder blade and he suffered it in the Bears’ week-one loss to the Falcons on Sunday.  This is beyond disappointing for White but it is also a major blow to the Bears who are already thin at the WR position after Cameron Meredith was lost for the year during a preseason game.  It also raises legitimate long term questions about White’s playing career as a whole.  The sad truth is that a lot of NFL careers have been killed in the cradle thanks to repeated injuries and one hopes that White at the age of 25 can bounce back and stay healthy enough to not just get on the field but stay on the field and produce up to his lofty draft stock.  At this point it is not looking good for White who is currently in the 3^rd year of his rookie contract that has yielded just 5 career starts, including Sunday’s effort that included 2 catches for 6 yards and 1 fractured scapula. 

Indianapolis Dolts: F

If I am the Indianapolis Colts’ head coach Chuck Pagano I am forcing the injured Andrew Luck to spend 24 hours a day, 7 days a week inside of a hyperbaric chamber whilst Mr. Miyagi rubs his hands together and then places them on Luck’s right shoulder repeatedly until he is ready to return to the playing field.  That is the only way that the Colts will have a chance to win any games this season.  Their roster is depleted on both sides of the ball and they looked like a Division 3 squad on Sunday when they got shellacked by the LA Rams.  The Rams defense owned the Colts in week-one as they racked up 2 pick sixes and a safety, meanwhile Jared Goff put up his first career 300-yard game in the 46-9 spanking.  Don’t get it twisted, that says more about the Colts than it does the Rams.  The Rams are not as good as the Colts made them look on Sunday and until Andrew Luck gets back in the lineup the Colts will remain the leagues’ doormat unit. 

Bengals Blanked: F+

Andy Dalton sank to Matt Schaub-like depths in week 1.  He threw 4 interceptions and only completed 16 passes in a shutout loss against The Baltimore Ravens.  The 20 – 0 final score was not a good look for the home team.  This is an organization that badly needs a bounce back season after missing the playoffs in 2016 following 5 straight wildcard game losses dating back to 2011.  Andy Dalton’s playoff and prime time choke jobs are easier for the Cincinnati fans to swallow when he consistently gets you 9 to 12 wins and a guaranteed playoff game.  But if he logs another 6-win season in the Nati, then look for the locals to start calling for AJ McCarron by mid-season and Marvin Lewis’ replacement by seasons’ end.  This organization is squarely at a crossroads and Sunday was one giant step in the wrong direction.