NFL PICK EM - WEEK 3
Every NFL blog writer tries to predict winner’s week to week
but the other guys go about it all wrong.
They watch game film and read injury and weather reports. I take it back to the good ole days of
soothsaying. Straight mystic, homie! Most
of those other clowns couldn’t read the entrails of an owl if I put them in a
paper bag and left it on their front doorstep.
Believe me…. I know (creepy 1000-yard stare).
So, make room for the new forecaster on the scene aka Buba
Vanga, aka Nostra-God-damus, aka The Medium in an XL, aka the Deplorable
Oracle, aka The Profitless Prophet, aka The Coin Genie Who Made Tom Hanks
Big. Now that you know how we do things
at www.bobtanney.com let’s get right to
the predictions.
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| Straight Mystic, Homie! |
3rd Level
Wizardry Prognostications - NFL Week 3:
Last Week’s record
12-4
Overall record 23-8
LA Rams at San
Francisco 49ers:
Thursday Night’s Game
On the surface this looks like another Thursday night
stinker but if you look deeper there will be a lot of young talent on display
in this one. The Rams are a better
overall team but when it comes to division foes, all bets are off. The tea leaves tell me the 49ers get off the
schneid in this one behind a strong performance by Carlos Hyde.
THE PICK: 49ers
Baltimore Ravens at
Jacksonville Jaguars (In London):
Jacksonville’s defense has some bite this year and is
finally starting to play up to its talent level, but their offense is still in
disarray. Look for the Ravens D to
continue to feast on weak offensive units this week. This may be a contest where the two defenses
combine for more points than the offenses.
That will really confuse the Brits!
THE PICK: Ravens
Houston Texans at New
England Patriots:
The Texans have a great defense and I really like Deshaun
Watson’s skills. I believe he is going
to lead the Texans to a playoff win.
Just not this season. Even if
Gronk isn’t 100% in this one I still foresee the Patriots picking apart Houston
and winning this one with room to spare.
Houston’s offense hasn’t scared anyone is years and I don’t envision
this week 3 road game in Foxborough being the dawning of an offensive
renaissance for Houston.
THE PICK: Patriots
New York Giants at
Philadelphia Eagles:
My gut tells me that there is no way that the Giants will fall
to 0-3 this week. But my gut has not
seen the Giants offensive line try to block NFL D-linemen and linebackers, my
eyes have. And my eyes tell me that
until Ben MacAdoo can figure out a game plan that masks his team’s lack of
talent along the O-line and running back units, or hand over the play calling
reins to someone who can, this team will keep losing. Plus, my eyes tell me that MacAdoo looks like
the assistant manager of a Footlocker who’s ‘flirting’ with the Bed Bath &
Beyond girls across the way is boarding on harassment.
THE PICK: Eagles
Cleveland Browns at
Indianapolis Colts:
The odds on favorite matchup for fewest viewers of the
week. Jacoby Brissett has now had a few
weeks under his belt in the Colts’ offense and the improvement should
show. If the Browns weren’t coming off
of back to back NFC North fistfights against the Steelers and Ravens, I’d pick
them to win this one, but between that and the Colts’ home field advantage I’m
giving the nod to Indianapolis in a close one.
THE PICK: Colts
Miami Dolphins at New
York Jets:
The 2017 Jets team is just downtrodden looking and going to
be the likely underdog in all of their games this year, even at home. The Dolphins won a close one against the
Chargers last week and Jay Cutler looked good in his first game as a
Dolphin. The oracles I keep floating in
my whisper to me that the Dolphins will continue to roll in this one and get
the W.
THE PICK: Dolphins
Tampa Bay Buccaneers
at Minnesota Vikings:
Until Sam Bradford’s status is known it’s going to be hard
for the Vikings to hang their hat on Case Keenum, no matter how good their
defense is. Especially against a team
that is loaded with talent like the Bucs are.
That is why I am going with the HBO Hard Knock darling Bucs to win this
one on the road.
THE PICK: Buccaneers
Denver Broncos at
Buffalo Bills:
I got to admit, the Broncos are surprising me so far this
season. I knew their D was going to be
stout but who could have predicted that Trevor Siemian would ball out like he
has in the first two weeks? Even my crystal ball was like “Really?! Him?” I fully expect the Broncos to get the job
done up in Buffalo this week and Siemian won’t even have to toss 4 TD’s to do
it.
THE PICK: Broncos
New Orleans Saints at
Carolina Panthers:
In a game that pits strength against strength with the
Saints potent offense going up against the Panthers stingy D, something has got
to give. The Saints are 0-2 and swiftly
moving into desperation mode. The
Panthers are 2-0 but are in a bit of a desperate space of their own with an
offense that was only able to put up 9 points last week and just lost Greg
Olsen to a broken foot on top of that. I’m
going against the grain on this one and picking the winless Saints to pull off
the upset on the road.
THE PICK: Saints
Pittsburgh Steelers
at Chicago Bears:
The Bears are a merited 0-2 and their best offensive weapon,
Jordan Howard is banged up with a bad shoulder and listed as questionable. The Steelers have been playing decent, but
not good football so far this season.
Luckily for them decent should be good enough to beat a bad Bears
squad. If it gets really bad look for
the Bears to officially come out of the “rebuilding closet” and turn to rookie
QB Mitchell Trubisky.
THE PICK: Steelers
Atlanta Falcons at
Detroit Lions:
Both Matt Ryan and Matthew Stafford are playing at an
incredibly high level so far this season and both teams have dangerously
underrated defenses, so this should be a fun one. I expect this to be a back in forth heavyweight
bout, but like a heavyweight bout from back in the late 80’s when the
heavyweight division in boxing was still good and exciting. This one may come down to who has the ball
last. Ultimately, I see the Falcons
escaping Motown with the win.
THE PICK: Falcons
Seattle Seahawks at
Tennessee Titans:
Both of these teams have been Jekyll and Hyde so far this
season, hence their matching 1-1 records.
Both the Tarot cards and the I Ching were unsure on this one. The Hawks have a better defense and WR unit,
but the Titans have a way better O-line and running backs. QB’s and special teams are a push, the
coaching nod has to go to Pete Carroll but the Titans are the home team. There was only one way to determine who will
win this game. Coin flip. Seahawks took it and will take the W in Music
City Sunday. It’s science.
THE PICK: Seahawks
Cincinnati Bengals at
Green Bay Packers:
Andy Dalton has been taking a ton of shit over the first two
weeks of the season in the Natti. And
for once it’s not just because he’s a ginger.
It seems that his ability to be ineffective at the pivot position during
playoff and prime-time games has bled over into regular season afternoon games
too. A lot of pundits think this will be
the game that Marvin Lewis gives him the hook for 2nd stringer AJ McCarron. I think that only happens if the Packers completely
shut down the Bengals in the first half which I don’t see happening on account
of the Packers D being a middling unit at best. All of that said, it would be absolutely
shocking if the Bengals marched into Lambeau Field and got a win. The Pack won’t shut the Bengals out but they will
win the game fairly easily.
THE PICK: Packers
Kansas City Chiefs at
LA Chargers:
This should be a hard-fought divisional game and if the
Chargers past has anything to say about it, then this one will likely be determined
by less than one score. It will also be won by the Chiefs. KC has won the past 6 meetings between these
teams and you can look for that to continue Sunday afternoon in LA.
THE PICK: Chiefs
Oakland Raiders at
Washington Redskins:
Sunday Night’s Game
Nether teams’ defense is particularly good in this matchup
so look for both Derek Carr and Kirk Cousins to chuck it all over the lot in
this one. I like Oakland in this one
simply because they have more playmakers across the board than Washington
does. The game within the game to watch
in this one will be Amari Cooper vs. Josh Norman. Cooper will be looking to ball out in this one
considering his counterpart, Michael Crabtree, went for 3 TDs last week. It will be interested to see whose will is
stronger in this one. Cooper, or
Norman? Both are in the upper echelon of
what they do.
THE PICK: Raiders
Dallas Cowboys at Arizona
Cardinals:
Monday Night’s Game
The Cowboys have a lot to prove after getting trounced by the Broncos 42-17 last week. Their offense has not been able to score 20
points in a game yet this year, and that shouldn’t be good enough to win a lot
of games in the NFL. The silver lining
for the silver star bunch in this one is that they are playing against an
uninspiring Cardinals team that is down their best player in RB David Johnson. I would not be surprised if the Cardinals
come out and play inspired ball at home and come away with the win, I just don’t
think it will happen on Monday night.
THE PICK: Cowboys
